#bethatgirl leadership retreat recap: i am worthy.

okay... so, i am THAT girl that has a really hard time forming words of gratitude or expressing thoughts when i'm part of something that moves me so deeply- pretty much to endless tears.

if you follow me at all on social media or we're real life friends, you know that last week, i spent the week in destin, florida with 40 other coaches at a leadership retreat. let me start by saying this- i, with all of my heart, did not feel like this retreat was something i deserved, earned, or should have taken the time to go to. i fought it long & hard. i battled with it for a while. but, something inside of me just kept saying "you're going"... (& then my husband was like YOU ARE INSANE IF YOU DO NOT GO TO THIS!- because he gets it. sometimes, more than i do!) & if i'm

taking this moment to be SUPER honest... i drove myself to the airport & parked my car in the extended lot (which is not cheap) because i was actually had a ridiculous thought that if i was waiting at the gate & decided i couldn't do it, my exit car would be there & i could just run right back out the door, go home, & be "normal".

but, i got on the plane.

& here's what happened next....

the first stop i made was in tampa where i spent the night with a coach on my team, Katie. i had the privilege of attending her insanity live class that she teaches every wednesday night & i got to meet her husband & her children. this, for me, was the night i knew it was all worth it. even if the trip ended there, it would have been okay. you see.... that night, when i was laying upstairs in their guest bedroom, i had this wild thought. Katie was Emily's best childhood friend. & in that moment, i thought.... "she's here. Em brought me here.... she wants Katie to know she's here. so i'm here. Em would have loved on those kids.... she would have loved to meet Katie's husband. Katie needs to know that Em is with her & thinks of her & loves her, too."

the next day, we raod-tripped to Destin with another coach, Liz, & that is where the magic really happened.

i don't think it's necessary that i go fully into detail, but the agenda was something like this...

live workouts with friends!
first night, we shared our stories. what brought us to where we are now as coaches. why we started. why we do what we do. what our struggles are... & guess what? we all had a common thread. we all have struggles. any anxieties i was feeling before arriving quickly vanished. everyone was there for the same reason- we love what we do & we struggle to love who we are.

teaching CIZE by the pool! 
the following days were full of trainings, personal stories, 1:1 time with corporate mentor, Cim Carver, professional photoshoots (complete with hair & makeup!), beach time, pool time, AMAZING FOOD-- THANK YOU, MATT MITRO! & serious bonding time.

what happened there all culminated in the result of what i brought home with me & who i have decided to be now.

see, my fears and apprehensions in attending this retreat were all rooted in one thing: my negative thoughts of self-worth. so many times, i said....

i don't deserve this.
i am not worthy of this.
this isn't for me.

pool fun!
but, i left there & now i think... why not me?

i am worthy.
i deserve good things because i work hard.
i work hard because i want others to know their worth, as well.

i truly am THAT girl.

i have to take a moment & truly thank Katy- who drags me along kicking & screaming sometimes, Melanie, & Val for all of the thought & effort & time they put into making this amazing retreat. & Matt- you're the man!

this may just be a little drop in a big ocean of what's to come- but, i will always look back on this experience as one of those that has forever change my life and the way i view MYSELF.

i am so thankful to have taken this little leap- because look at where it has taken me? i have traveled all over in this past year with no financial stress, no wondering if we will be able to afford it because i have found something that speaks to my heart & allows me to be exactly who i am. when i started, i just wanted to make enough money to cover my own shakeology & my health insurance... & sometimes, i have to pinch myself when i see where this can take me & my family. i have made friends that have become family.. who care enough about what means so much to me that they helped me raise over $50,000 to have a research grant named after our angel, Em. how can i not think that there is a bigger purpose for me when i am shown EVERY SINGLE DAY that there is?

to learn more about the specifics of this trip, watch this video!

there is that saying that says you can't fully love someone else until you learn to love yourself... & i always thought of that in regard to romantic relationships. but, now, i see that it applies to every relationship.

i vow today to learn to love all of me. i will not focus solely on my imperfections because they, too, are a part of what makes me who i am. i am balanced because of them. i will no longer ignore them, but work to make them better without obsessing over them negatively.

i would love to show you how you can do the same.

yes, this started out as a health & fitness journey.
but, i am so much more than that.

why not you?

to learn more on how to take your own leap, fill out the application below....

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